Jane's fundraising will help other families

A wife who was able to spend the last days of her husband’s life in a sleeper chair by his side has raised money so others can have the same experience.

Rev Peter Ashman died at the William Harvey Hospital in July, and his wife Jane and their family and friends raised £1,378.50 in his memory.

She donated the money to East Kent Hospitals Charity and it was used to buy a chair for Kennington ward, where he was cared for.

Jane said: “It was a total shock to find ourselves in the position of losing Peter.

“His death was not expected, and it was a very short three-week illness.

“For the last six days of Peter’s life, we were lucky enough to have a side room on Kennington ward and for those last few precious days I didn’t care about anything other than being with Peter.

“The one thing that made the most difference to us was the sleeper chair. Being able to lay down next to my soulmate for the last few nights we had together on earth, was a total game changer.

“I knew immediately what I wanted to dedicate any donations to – I made it my mission to raise enough money to gift a sleeper chair to Kennington Ward in Peter’s name.

“It is my hope that this sleeper chair will enable other patients and their families to stay connected and find peace at the end of their journeys too.”

Peter served as a minister for 36 years before retiring seven years ago. His most recent position was 18 years as a Rector to four rural churches and their communities in Lyminge, Postling, Stanford and Paddlesworth. He was also the Normandy Veterans’ chaplain in Folkestone for more than 20 years, working closely with the Royal British Legion, and served as chaplain for South East Coast Ambulance Service, supporting staff.

Jane said: “Peter was full of life and would do anything for anyone. He was known for being very approachable and supportive, often walking along-side those in both their happiest and darkest days of their lives.

“After spending time with Peter, people usually had a large smile on their face and felt lighter, he had a real gift for helping others to find peace.  I feel so blessed we had seven fabulous years of retirement together, doing things we/he loved; going away in the camper, kayaking, cycling and BBQing, in addition to spending quality time with family and friends which he treasured.

“Peter was also a brilliant doting Grandad, who loved nothing more than spending precious time creating adventures and memories with his daughter, her husband and with our two beautiful grandsons who we saw weekly.

“It is impossible to measure how much Peter meant to others, the hundreds and possibly thousands of people Peter’s life touched for the better.

“This is why I feel so grateful we are able to donate the sleeper chair to Kennington ward in Peters name, it is such a fitting legacy which means everything to me.”

Jane was by Peter’s side throughout his final days, and paid tribute to the staff for their care and compassion.

She said: “Peter found a love of orange ice lollies, and we were so grateful to the staff who were only too happy for Peter to have one whenever he fancied it, which was hourly at times, sometimes starting at 5am!

“I will also be forever grateful to the nursing staff who managed to borrow the sleeper chair, which enabled us to have a real physical connection. 

“I could hold his hand throughout it all, whilst laying flat so I could also rest.”

The team were also able to help Jane and Peter make a hand cast, funded using donations to the 3 Wishes Project, which helps families make meaningful memories at the end of someone’s life.

Jane said: “It now has pride of place in our lounge, something I treasure and am eternally grateful for.”

Ward manager Catherine Iblan Strixner said: “We are so grateful to Jane and Peter’s loved ones for this donation of a sleeper chair.

“It will make a real difference to other families who are sadly in the same situation, and will allow them to be more comfortable as they spend time with their relative in their final days.”

Since raising the money for the sleeper chair, Jane has also become a volunteer Participation Partner for the Trust, with a special interest in end-of-life-care.